Pretty Woman – Everything is Not What It Seems…

Pretty Woman is one of my favorite movies of all time.  I was channel surfing the other night, and guess what was on TV?  It never gets old to me, and as they say, “You can watch a movie 10 times, and still see something different.”  Well, this time, my observation was, “Everything is Not What It Seems.”  Richard Gere sort of tripped into the life of Julia Roberts, with no plans of falling in love, but she intrigued his curiosity.  Enough that he wanted to see and know more of her.  She was in it for a quick dollar and a good time, and he was just looking for a “drive by” or so he thought…

th[1]Edward is a rich and sophisticated businessman who specializes in corporate raiding – buying up businesses to break them up and sell them off in pieces. Vivian is a Los Angeles prostitute struggling with her lifestyle and a need to pay the rent. On a business trip to Los Angeles, Edward hires Vivian to be his girlfriend for a week while he traverses the local social circles. Love and various social complications invade their tidy arrangement and have the pair wondering if this Cinderella-story could have a happy ending.

I will work from the end to the beginning…

The last line of the movie was, “What does the Princess do when the Prince rescues her, She rescues him right back?” 

What they didn’t know in the beginning was that they were both rescuing one another, but it was in their journey and exploration that would connect and give them a better appreciation for one another.  Each day brought about new adventure, and neither of them would admit their attraction to one another, beyond the obvious, so they went with the flow, and played the game, but it didn’t take long for the tide to turn.

He thought that he would be doing her a favor by taking her off the streets, but all the time, she was actually put there to, in turn rescue him.  It doesn’t matter what hand life has dealt us, it doesn’t have to determine our fate, and there is always a lesson in your living. 

Don’t judge a book by it’s cover – POINT BLANK!  Although she was a prostitute, had on a blonde wig, with skimpy clothes and 6 inch heels, she probably had more to offer him, than he did with his riches.  He was dressed to kill in his Rodeo Drive caliber suit, but was still a mess on the inside, which is why he had not connected with women before.  What did she do that was so different?  She actually observed and listened to him – and his money wasn’t a factor. She asked questions, analyzed, and because she grew to care about him, she offered solace.  It’s nothing more sexier than a women that can help her man work through some things, and still make him feel like he did it on his own.  Love is meant to balance you out, and we miss out on opportunities by judging what we see on the surface.  When she ultimately removed the clothes and wig, he couldn’t stop staring at her.  The real problem with her was, she didn’t know her worth.  She thought her circumstances defined who she was, but what he “gave back” to her was a sense of security.

Please understand:  God doesn’t make mistakes.  We pray for a husband/wife or soul mate, and even if he/she was to  walk right up to you, you wouldn’t know it, because they don’t look like, what you’ve told yourself you wanted.  Love doesn’t come wrapped in a pretty bow, with a resounding horn that announces itself, but its actually right there for us to unwrap and discover it’s beauty. 

DON’T BE IN A HURRY – DON’T LOSE FOCUS  and  TRUST YOURSELF!  Give love and the unsuspecting a chance! It’s when you step out on faith, and trust the process and His promise, that you actually get what you WANT and NEED!

Terry D.

I do – Maybe NOT?

People either use the excuse of not wanting to get married, because it ‘s just a piece of paper, they don’t believe in it, or they’ve seen too many marriages fail .

First and foremost, it’s not just a piece of paper, it’s our commitment before God, that we will honor one another. Why the hell is it such an ordeal to NOT do it, if its just a piece of paper? I often wonder if we wouldn’t feel so stressed, if we made the decision for the right reasons.  There are people  who almost go into cardiac arrest about the mere thought of marriage, because they feel brow beaten or guilted into it, and those who feel as if they have no choice… Even if the person agrees to marry you, are you okay with resentfully being loved?

20130828-173650.jpgSecondly, if someone you’re with, doesn’t believe in marriage, either they’re a product of a broken home, they’re buying time to see if there’s something better out there, or they could honestly be afraid! The fear can come from so many underlying factors, and a sense of feeling as if they’re going to lose something by signing up for such a long term commitment that now also includes having to consider another person in everything they do.  I think we believe that it’s as simple as, if you love me, you will marry me, but it is so much more than that!  As much as the one person may guilt someone else into marrying them, they may very well not be ready themselves.  You shouldn’t just marry someone because you have history, and believe that because you hung in there, they now owe you something.  You made the decision to stay – right or wrong.   20130906-205505.jpg

Marriage doesn’t fail.  People fail to honor their vows in their marriage, aren’t willing to put in the work and blame one another for not giving their all!

The scripture that is so often used when it comes to love holds true.

1st Corinthians 13: 4-8
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.8 Love never fails.

“We justify and adjust our behaviors and feelings, based on what others think and say, with the hopes that they’ll change.” – Terry D.

Take the Five Languages of Love Quiz ( Gary Chapman)

Terry D.

The Devil Thought He Had Me!

You meant evil against me, but God meant it for Good. Genesis 50:20

20130904-055105.jpgWhewwwww… Where do I start? YES – The devil thought he had me, but “you’s” a lie!  Just recently, I had a complete melt down! Woe is me, why me, I can’t do this… My conscience grabbed me by the collar, pinned me against the wall, and told me to check myself and suck it up. Well, what happens when it’s not so easy to suck it up and life seems to be drowning you out? Sort of like the movies, when you have the devil on one shoulder, and an angel on the other, and they’re tugging at you – whispering in your ear.  It’s comically illustrated on film, but in life, you wrestle with the same decisions, that aren’t so funny.  I mean really, sometimes, a little screaming and crying is just what the doctor ordered to put things in perspective.  Everyone handles things differently, and as long as you don’t wallow in it too long – we all recover.

I wasn’t sure if this was God trying to tell me something, or if I was just being a big BABY!  Just because others seek advice from me, doesn’t mean I’m above seeking my advice. I called on a really good objective, but very honest friend, that I knew would be compassionate, but would tell me to GET IT TOGETHER! We talked for hours, and decided to become accountability partners. He knew my history and everything about me, so I knew he would hold me accountable for my foolishness! Sometimes its simple, and at others times – not so much. It’s okay, because we’re all human. It’s when you face your demons, take off the blinders, and be very honest with YOURSELF;  because it doesn’t matter what you do or say, until you can face the truth, and knowing that NO MATTER WHAT, you are more than a conqueror.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but my life experiences have been good teachers, and while going through some really tough lessons, that I didn’t necessarily understand at the time, they were etched out for me to be able to share and help others in their journey.

God has given me a gift, and I don’t negate the fact that with EVERY SINGLE LESSON, good or bad, there was purpose. There is ALWAYS purpose in your journey, and they are usually not just for you…

All that being said, he didn’t win, because I’m still standing, and STRONGER!

Terry D.20130904-055000.jpg