Is Mary Jane Being Gabrielle Union?

20140109-231754.jpgI’ll be the first to admit that I enjoy the new Mini Series, Being Mary Jane.  It reveals some real life situations that we would like to sweep under the rug, keep between the sheets or far back in our medicine cabinet.  Gabrielle has embraced this conflicted power woman, with a high libido and racy role like no other; but everyone can’t help but wonder if it’s because it closely resembles past and recent events in  her own personal life, concerning her relationship with Miami Heat Guard, Dwyane Wade.  So that bears the question, “Is Mary Jane actually Being Gabrielle Union?”

Kelly Ripa Michael Strahan Gabrielle UnionThe Talk Shows probed about her recent engagement, but skated around her recent relationship woes, as she toured for the Premiere of the Mini Series this past Tuesday, January 7.  Does she really owe anyone an explanation about why she made the decision to stay with Wade, after hearing that he fathered a child, during their brief break in their relationship?  Why do we always think that celebrities owe us a blow-by-blow explanation about their lives?  At the end of the day, we love drama, but would we really want to talk about something so painful, at every corner?  I would like to believe that some have grown to love Gabrielle over the past year, in seeing a different side of her, after her confession to being a former ‘Mean Girl,’ as well as being able to better relate to  her, in the role she has  recently stepped into as Being Mary Jane.

As women,

  1. Are we genuinely concerned for her, because we believe she deserves better?
  2. Are we just fed up with athletes getting away with womanizing and disrespectful behavior toward women,  OR
  3. Are we just nosy busy bodies that feed off of drama?

We don’t like to talk about it, but the reality is that women (not all) do sleep around, and even with married men.  To her defense, she initially didn’t know he was married, but even after finding out, he continued to play on her vulnerability , until she gave into her insecurities and libido.  Yes, it’s true, women are doing some of the things that are being played out in this show.  The quick wash ups in the bathroom, the agonizing over whether or not to answer a call, text or IM, the masturbation before a date!  Is it unfortunate?  I guess it depends on who you’re asking…

As we continue to watch, MJ always seems her happiest when she has a man by her side, which screams, “I feel incomplete without a man!” The truth of the matter is, it’s a little easier for MJ to sleep with a couple different men, because she’s using sex as a coping mechanism, a band-aid on a gunshot wound.  In the following clip, Gabrielle explains how in her real life, she blames herself for the infidelity that happened, while she and fiancée, Dwyane Wade were on a break from one another, because her work schedule got in the way of her being able to fully commit to him, sexually or otherwise;  although you could almost always see her court side, screaming at a ref, or cheering  on the Miami Heat Guard, Wade.


In the following scene, it  eerily resembles recent real life events of Gabrielle Union.


clipA Clip From Next Week’s Episode

Please leave your comments, questions or thoughts, and let’s start the conversation!

Terry D.


The Love We Lost

No, life is not the same, and yes, life is more complicated now, and there are way more variables that are in play now, but let’s talk about the foundations that were not negotiable, when our parents dated, the ones they hoped to pass onto us, and how they held their marriages together, in spite of…

None of these  lessons start when you’re grown.  These values are put into motion early.  If we want change, if we want the divorce rate to decrease, and the marriage rate to increase  among African-Americans, we have to be the change agents!

seedThe Foundation – They Took Us To Church

All of us knew that Sunday morning was reserved for church.  For that matter, a few more days of the week as well.  Even if we didn’t want to be there, we went, participated, and the seed was being planted and rooted, but somehow along the way, we began giving our children a choice, as we attended service on Sunday, as they stayed home and slept.  Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

The Parents Were Involvedfamily

You couldn’t just pick up a young lady, by blowing the horn, and before you started leaving the house together, there definitely had to be several supervised dates at the house.  They did things together with the family, so that everyone could get to know the character of this young man.  If he didn’t seem to have her best interest at heart, it wouldn’t be long before he was no longer allowed to come around, and even if the daughter was hurt, she respected her parents, because she knew there were consequences.

daddydaughterThe Father Made It Crystal Clear of What was NOT Going to Happen, While Someone Dated His Daughter. 

When a young lady brought home a young man for her parents to meet, the father and the brothers made sure he saw them, and let their presence be known, and the unconditional love they had for her.  Just in case he wanted to disrespect her, by calling her names, put his hands on her or step out-of-pocket for any reason, he knew he would have someone to answer to.  We have to be unapologetic in teaching equal respect to not only our daughters, but also our sons.  It will be reluctantly acknowledged, mimicked and appreciated later.

They Taught Us About Love, Through Actiongrowingold

We may have seen them fight, but we also saw them work through it, and honor their vows. When things got a bit thick, that’s when the foundation helped, because that ‘s when you saw/heard Mama praying.  They loved us enough to discipline us, when we were wrong.  The main component to their love, was that they didn’t fight for power, they shared.


Sometimes, just the basics may be not be enough, but God has always been enough, and that is where the love begins.  You have to put the work in, because our children really do imitate our actions.  It means something to attend church with your parents, It means something to see functional relationships as  a child, it means something to know that love begins at home and it definitely means a whole hell of a lot, when you can use these same tools to keep that foundation together.  


I would love to hear your thoughts or experiences.  Please leave your comments below!

Terry D.

All That Glitter, Ain’t Gold, in the Wade/Union Household!

Do celebrities think they operate above the rim of morals, because they know all will be forgotten and forgiven in a matter of weeks or months, with no further mention or real consequences?  After watching the following story unfold, maybe we’re so forgiving, because we’ve seen these stories play out before us, and if the person involved can forgive, then who are we not to?   Gabrielle Union tweeted,  “The goal is NOT perfection… The goal is to be whole.”

This brings me to:

Breaking News of Dwyane Wade’s Love Child

Dwyane Wade, (3) Miami Heat Guarddwade

Dwyane Wade and his recent news fallout of his love child,  Xavier Zechariah Wade,  born in November, 2013.   Wade confirmed that he did indeed father a son with Aja Metoyer. Wade acknowledged the development to the Sun Sentinel, he said: ‘I had a time, a part in our break, in our pain and our hurt, a blessing came out of it in my life, having a son that was born healthy. So I’m moving on.’  gu leaving It is reported that Gabrielle had to step away from Wade, when first learning of the news, but they worked through their differences,  prior to their engagement!   Everyone is weighing in on this story, and as the story continues to unfold, so does more details on who is Aja  Metoyer.  One thing for sure, she is showing her true colors, and just how messy she really is, by writing this very detailed Letter to Ms. Union.

gu engagement ring

Wade proposed to Gabby 6 weeks after his son was born, which he enlisted the assistance of his 2 sons and nephew he’s raising.  Both contend that the child was conceived during a break the two took from one another, but all roads lead to evidence of a different color.  The two were reportedly very much together during conception, but that’s neither here nor there, since they’ve worked through it.  

To make matters a bit more interesting, the mother of his child, is also the mother of 2 daughters, fathered by Damon Wayans Jr., the son of Damon Wayans, who issued a brief statement about the mother of his 2 daughters.   

Forgiveness, Foolishness or Fate?

Everyone wants to know how Gabrielle would stay with Wade, with all that has transpired.  Others say that its karma, because she dated him, while he was still married.  Did she forgive him, because she loves him?  Is it foolishness for her to think he won’t, or has not continued with his infidelity, or was it really fate?   For some reason, we think celebrities are cut from a different cloth than us.  At the end of the day, they just have more money and notoriety than we do, but they’re still human.  Love is love, pain is pain and we all make mistakes, and cry when our hearts are broken.  The difference is, we don’t have our lives played out for all the world to see; and we have all forgiven people for things we aren’t proud of.  Some of us have dated people in some very compromising positions, but we get to keep it all under wraps.  I will say that it is easy to say what you would or wouldn’t do, if it’s not you in the spotlight.

No matter what decision she ultimately ends  up making, it’s still hers to deal with and make. Let me know what you think.  Please leave a comment below, and lets chat…

Terry D.