This year has been rewarding and productive, but not without its challenges. This has been my year of living, “Intentionally.”

JANUARY

On January 19, 2017, I self-published my first book, My Truth. My Truth is a non-fiction novelette, that will give you an insight into the twists and turns of my personal failures and successes in love and relationships – in hopes to help others in their own journey to healthy love. I grappled with the idea of baring my soul to the world, but when it was all said and done, I knew my testimony was meant for someone else, so I stopped questioning God’s plan. This project was so much bigger than me, and I couldn’t worry about what others would think of me. This has been one of the most liberating things I’ve done in my life, and the feedback validates my decision to be obedient.

FEBRUARY

For a few years now, I have been speaking and training for everyone else. I have attended events of amazing men, women and organizations, where they shared their journey and helped so many others discover their purpose. I knew I had it in me to do the same, but I allowed fear to cripple me. It was all I could think and talk about, but I made every excuse in the book, to avoid actually acting on my passion. Finally, I just began researching, planning, preparing and executing. I only shared it with a select few, because I didn’t want any reason not to follow through. I had a plan, an agenda and a budget. Searching for venues was not an easy task, but I was all in. I looked and I looked and I looked. Finally, I booked the venue, paid my deposit and just like that, there was no turning back. It was really happening – February 4 to be exact.

To say the least, it was surreal and rewarding, but not because I finally did it, but because of the real masks that were removed and the lives that were transformed. Men and women alike, shared their unadulterated truth, and it became a domino effect of testimonials. It was an experience indeed, and no one left there the same way they arrived. Spirits were renewed, and the attendees left with a sense of purpose and hope – knowing they’re not alone in their journey to wholeness, removing their masks without shame and Living their Truth!

MARCH

March gave me a moment to catch my breath, reflect, and shift my gears to 2nd Quarter goals, obligations and commitments. I used this time to refuel and follow up on the progress of some clients I was coaching and confirm engagements. On March 25, I was the Keynote Speaker for the “Unapologetically Me” Women’s Luncheon, hosted by Nikita Legrone of Exclusive Extraordinary Events.

While I was there to impart knowledge and pour into other women, it was humbling to hear their, “WHY!”

Why they had to make their way there
Why they had lost hope
Why they felt God had given up on them

APRIL & MAY

Can you say, “RESET?” Not that I’m ever allowed to take it off, but it was time to put on my full Mommy hat. I had to switch gears, and focus on my personal obligations. I am the very proud Mom of my mini me. It was planning time for my daughter’s Prom and Graduation. I did not plan much during these months, because she deserved all of my uninterrupted and full attention. Such proud moments that you can never get back, have to be your priority. I enjoyed every moment of watching her come into her own over the years, and the reward of watching her get transformed into a princess for Prom is indescribable. The pride of watching your daughter who the doctors said wouldn’t make it to see the age of 18, had me up plenty of nights in this season, with tear stained pillows of joy and gratitude for God’s mercy!

JUNE

I’m still recovering from the Prom and Graduation festivities, but she’s over it and me by now. I guess it’s back to business as usual. This is not the time to chill. I have the remainder of my year accounted for and planned. I’m now planning for 2018. I’ve done some photo shoots to plan for upcoming promotions and doing my due diligence for upcoming opportunities. After all of that, I do take time to pour back into me. It’s a continued struggle to have work-life balance, but it’s necessary for your sanity, and not to become overwhelmed. I have to make some me/we time, and ensure I’m not taking my daughter for granted…

Stay tuned for upcoming events for the remainder of 2017!

Terry D.

How did I survive life after Heartbreak?

I hear my clients say all the time:

Maybe I’m not meant to be with anyone
I don’t think I can survive another failed relationship
At least I have someone
What’s wrong with me?

NO NO NO – stop that foolishness

Well, let me tell you:

I dated someone for years that was a compulsive liar, and a repeat offender of cheating. I continued to forgive him – I know what you’re thinking – who in their right mind would stay with someone like that? I asked myself the same thing, and thought I would never escape my self doubt and insecurities. See, it wasn’t him to blame for the madness, it was me for not thinking I could do better, but YES, I survived, and I’m free. I’m free mentally, physically and emotionally.

I took my power back, and I no longer felt like I had to depend on someone else for my happiness. HA – so guess what? I win and his loss!

There is life after Heartbreak!

You name it, I’ve been through it, as a lot of us have, but I covered up my insecurities with sex and loveless relationships! Judge me if you want, but I feel like someone lifted a mack truck off my heart. My biggest breakthrough came when I had a complete meltdown in the middle of my bedroom floor. Crying uncontrollably, and releasing the toxins and stench of deceit.

After I realized I didn’t love myself enough, I started counseling, I prayed and I finally started confiding in my close friends. I needed an outlet, and I was no longer going to hold this all in. To my surprise, there were other women going through, or had been through something similar.

So, for those of you who may be struggling with this same issue, here’s what helped me:

I had an accountability partner who I called when I thought I was getting weak
I remained in counseling
I stayed prayed up

If you don’t seek help, you will continue to repeat and attract the same characteristics in men!

IN BETWEEN THESE STEPS, I CRIED A LOT, SOMETIMES DOUBTED MYSELF & EVEN SLIPPED UP AND CALLED HIM, BUT I DIDN’T GET TOO DOWN ON MYSELF, THAT I COULDN’T RECOVER, GET BACK UP & KEEP IT MOVING…

I actually wrote down the things that happened, where it took a turn and why I stayed so long
I stayed away from dating until I was healed and able to trust
I FORGAVE HIM, AND THEN I FORGAVE MYSELF

Forgiveness was key, but I also had to get to the core of the problem, and why I thought any of this was okay. Counseling definitely helped me with this, and boy oh boy did I get clarity, and the true healing began…

What was my core problem? It was the negative seeds mentally planted throughout my life, that I never knew would contribute to my dysfunctional relationship habits.

Terry D.